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The Secret of Clark Mountain

Dick Traina

Welcome to Clark. The administration is happy to offer you an educational and growth environment second to none. Just follow these simple rules, condensed from "Synergy":
 - Go to class.
 - Pay your tuition on time.
 - Don't question anything.
If you choose to accept this happy horseshit, see a doctor.
If not, transfer. There's a handy list of fine universities hanging in the cafeteria.